The ship that never sinks

Watched a movie a couple of days ago. The movie - Kadhal Desam it was called - should be about 8-9 years old, I think. It was the only recognizable Tamil one available in the shop. It had great music by Rahman, and some catchy songs, so I thought "Fine. At least Kamala doesn't need subtitles, and it would be a nice, light, G-rated film to watch together". So we came home and turned it on. The titles rolled to the tune of

Mustafa Mustafa....

the film's song on friendship - a heavily English based, but very catchy song, and we sat there and danced-in-place to it, the anticipation building.

The story is about two men of college age who are best friends. Arun and Karthik are from different colleges, meet by accident, and from them on, hang out together often and enjoy each other's company. Karthik, a poet, is in love with a girl in his college, Divya. Unbeknownst to him, his best friend also loves the same girl. Divya has met each of them separately and likes them both. The first half drags and the plot is wafer-thin. Not even presented in a crisp way, and can even get boring at times.

So what's new, you ask. The story - and the ending. Divya's parents are looking for a matrimonial match for her. She tells them that the man she would marry should not only be compatible socially and habits-wise, but should also be a good friend. Whereupon, her father suggests - why not choose to marry Arun or Karthik, as they are her best buddies already?

Divya decides to act on her father's suggestion. She loves both dearly as friends, and is unaware that they both have romantic feelings for her. When she comes to know, she agonizes about it. Her dad asks her - "How come my Divya, who flits about freely like a bird normally, is so sullen and morose these days? What is it my child?".

Divya weeps on his shoulder and says "This bird - has been asked to choose between her right wing and her left wing, dad!"

That was touchingly honest. Not something one would find in a commercial Tamil film. Her dilemma is shown honestly, as is the ardent pursuit of both men, to win her heart. In the end she tells them - friendship is precious, and she cannot break either friend's heart. Since they both would do anything for her, why not give up their 'love' and stick to being her friends forever? For, isn't friendship the purest form of love? Where people give for the joy of giving, make no pretences, are unselfish, and expect nothing from each other but the feeling they share - the one of friendship?

The film ends to the tune of:

Mustafa Mustafa don't worry Mustafa
Time's our friend - Mustafa!
Day by day, day by day
We journey through life day by day
Friendship's the one ship that never sinks!

Amen to that spirit. My thoughts exactly. The one place where one feels lightest at heart is with a true friend. So why claim this is less, and some other relationships are more?

I call myself a romantic. And romance, I have seen.....Don't know how long it lasts. It ebbs and flows, and many a time, one is fulfilling a role, conforming to the expectations that come with it..... Sometimes pretending to emotions that don' t exist - pretending to like someone in the significant other's circle, when one really doesn't, for example - to keep the peace. People watch moods, walk on eggshells occasionally, try to act in a manner that's purportedly the ideal, as if following a script - and who knows that feeling better than me?

But with a friend.....nah. The spirit is set free! Soars to the highest peaks feeling light as a feather, shorn of all the fakeness, the guilt trips and the dramas that may accompany other roles. A friend is a kindred spirit in life's journey, one who makes it enjoyable, and easy to bear. A friend loves you and accepts you as is. May not agree with you always - but at such times, just shows you that other alternatives may exist to the path you're taking - and leave it to your choice. No judgements, no guilt trips, no dramas. What a liberating relationship, this!

In my ideal world, we would all be spirits, linked by this bond of friendship, free as children, to hang out with whoever one chooses to. No romance, no drama. And children are obtained by praying to God :). What an great world that would be!

Happy New Year to everyone, and here's to the ship that never sinks!